Dear Straight Talk: I’m 17 and being seduced by a “Mrs. Robinson.” She’s a rich divorced friend of my mom’s in her 40s, in great shape and very attractive. First she offered me good money to do yard work. Then she started giving me wine afterwards. Then she seduced me. Now she gives me really big tips for the excellent “yard work.”
I feel guilty and almost like a male prostitute. However, she’s hard to resist and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like the money. A friend says her actions are illegal and I should blackmail her. I don’t want to blackmail her or get her in trouble, I just want to tell her it’s over, but I keep doing it “one more time” and can’t stop myself. I appreciate any advice. — Seduced in Petaluma
Katelyn, 18, Azusa: This is a family friend, divorced, wealthy and obviously a smooth operator. You need support getting out of this, even if not from parents. There is no way some drama won’t be involved and it could be unsafe.
Nicole, 23, Santa Rosa: Be aware that she may feel rejected. Successful breakups have involved me saying, “I’m emotionally sidetracked right now and cannot meet your needs.”
Ochatre, 23, Uganda: You know what you are doing, you admit it isn’t right, but you fail to make a decision. Best advice: Look deeply inside and imagine sharing your experience with your parents, siblings and relatives. I believe after such an imagining you will have the strength to move on with your life.
Christina, 20, Marysville: You feel almost like a male prostitute? Stop!
Ashley, 25, Auburn: Once I finally made the cut in my last breakup, I was in a much better place — and you will be, too. But you must stick with your decision! You can make money elsewhere. And someone else will find you attractive.
Dear Seduced: An attractive divorced 40-something woman who is “buying” a 17-year-old plaything isn’t the most stable cougar on the veldt. Indeed, she is a sex offender. Blackmail could bring out the worst in her (glad you reject that notion) — but casual sex with anyone lonely and unstable is, frankly, hazardous. Stop seeing her NOW. For your safety, break up gently (stoking her ego), but stay clear of her. Don’t enter her home or yard again. Send a written communication saying that she’s beautiful and you will miss her, but the relationship isn’t appropriate. It’s crucial to cut this off cleanly. If she pesters you with voicemails, texts, etc., respond in writing once with, “Due to our age differences, it’s best we make a clean break.” Then STOP communicating. Have support throughout, and if things get strange, be prepared to tell your parents everything. — Lauren
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