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Need help to be more social

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Posted: Friday, March 8, 2013 12:00 am

Dear T2T: Hi. I’m going to be a high school sophomore next year, and I’ve never had a girlfriend, or even been friends to many girls. I’m fine around my guys, but I just get shy and unexciting around girls. I’m an overachiever in school, and don’t really ever get up the courage to really do anything with most girls. I almost had a girlfriend once... but we were so similar, we never went farther than talking and only went out at a dance... I barely even admire from afar now... I need help on things to do to be more social so they will like me... I dunno. I only make about 1 friend a year and need help with getting anywhere AT ALL! with a girl... thanks! — Choker

Response No. 1:

We completely understand your problem. Many people go through the same situation through their high school years. Talking to the opposite sex is always overwhelming and can be quite nerve-wrecking. To conquer your fear of talking to girls you can always do it in a modest way. For example: you can join clubs in school, extracurricular activities such as sports, go to social gatherings, and venture out to meet new people. I was in the same boat and what I chose to do was to join a sport. By doing so, I felt like I always had people I could count on. My team is like a family, this continued throughout my years of high school. Instead of trying to make only 1 friend a year, you should times that by 20. The best way to meet new people is to step out of your comfort zone and show your personality. Don’t be afraid to be yourself, your true friends should accept you as you are. As far as meeting new girls goes, act like yourself. They’re not a different species or anything. You should treat them like you would treat anybody else. If you are looking to find a girlfriend, you need to put yourself out there and be fun to be around. Thank you for your time and we hope you the best with your situation and hope you meet plenty of new people.

Response No. 2:

Although we understand where you’re coming from, don’t worry about it too much - there’s no hurry! You’re still a sophomore - you have your entire life ahead of you. But if you still want to, get involved in something that introduces you to people such as a club or even a sport that simply increases your social interaction! (Think of extracurriculars your school has that can provide you with multiple benefits like Do Something Club) Co-ed sports include tennis, badminton, basketball, water polo, swim, and it only goes on. Although you wouldn’t be on a co-ed team, it’s still a common interest to start conversations. And when it comes right down to it, make sure you always act like yourself - any girl worth your time will like you for who you are. Don’t try to be someone your not. Good luck!

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