Dear T2T: This is pretty serious stuff. My friend was totally date raped and I don’t know how to help her. She confided in me and I promised not to tell anyone and I haven’t, but I know she really needs more help than I can give her. I don’t want to rat her out, but I am so worried about her. I am torn in half about it. One side of me wants to keep the promise I made her but the other side of me wants to tell someone who can really help her. What would you do? — Sucky Situation
Response No. 1:
I apologize about your friend’s situation. We understand that this is a tough issue for you and your friend. Things like this are not very easy to deal with. Whatever you do, make sure you are doing the right thing. You should talk to your friend about talking to somebody for help. Tell her that it is important to let someone know for her health and safety. She should not keep things like this to herself because it’s a very serious matter. She needs to know that there are a lot of possibilities that can put her into danger, such as HIV, STDs, and pregnancy. Lead her into feeling open with someone that she is close to and that she can confide in. This is a very serious situation and she needs to let someone know. This way, you are not losing her trust but you are doing what is best for her. If you were to tell someone else after she told you not to tell anyone, she would not be able to trust you as a friend anymore. Rape is a serious problem in society and it is a very big deal. This happens too often with teenagers these days and it needs to stop. Take the little step to make a difference and break the silence. We hope you take our advice. Sit down and talk to your friend about the whole situation. We hope everything we said was taken in to consideration and we wish you and your friend the best.
Response No. 2:
Our best advice is sitting with your friend and getting her to seriously think about talking to a counselor or adult. If she does or doesn’t plan on taking your advice, you still need to let someone know. Convince her that letting someone know would be best, relieving stress from both of you. Her mental health is more important than a promise. Even if you feel like you are “ratting her out,” it will be worth it in the long run. Try to make her feel comfortable about this touchy subject. She is not alone. This is a serious matter that you must take into your own hands.
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