Dear T2T: I totally like my best friend’s brother and she has no idea. I think he likes me back because he always flirts with me. My friend hates all of his girlfriends and will be so mad at me if I go out with him. I really like him though so I am not sure what to do. — Brother Lover
Response No. 1:
This is a very difficult situation but we do understand what you’re going through. I know you are afraid of your friend knowing about whom you are liking but its best for her to know. Maybe you should talk to her in a joking matter to see how she reacts before telling him behind her back and causing problems with your best friend. On the other hand with her brother flirting with you is an “every guy” thing. They like to flirt with girls to mess with their minds to get attention. Don’t get your hopes up and then end up finding out he doesn’t like you. If you truly think he likes you then talk to him privately and ask him if he does. It is best to figure out if he does like you in a personal level to see if he really does like you. It is very concerning to see people upset over rejection. As in your best friend just talk to and see what she says. Most likely she would understand if she is your best friend. She would probably treat you differently in a positive matter, if you and her brother were to date. So do not stress and it will be fine.
Response No. 2:
If you are really best friends with her, maybe she won’t mind you dating her brother, especially if her brother really likes you back. Remember that since you are her best friend, you will be able to gauge her reaction better than anyone you can ask. Since she has a history of disliking her brother’s previous girlfriend, it is very possible that this could complicate the relationship with both your friend and the brother. Before making any decisions, you should definitely talk to your best friend about this first. You don’t want to surprise her with this news, especially if she is against it. If you talk to her and she is against you dating her brother, it will ultimately come down to a decision of who you value more. If this is just a ’fling’ because you want attention or are only temporarily interested in the brother, then it is probably a better idea to not date your best friend’s brother. The most important thing for you to do is to talk to your friend and tell her how much her friendship means to you. Ultimately she should have a say in this and you should respect her decision.
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