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New results show she wasn't at fault, but driver who struck local firefighter still grieves

By Layla Bohm
News-Sentinel Staff Writer
Friday, October 2, 2009 6:07 AM PDT

Comments (21 comment(s))

Five weeks after she struck and killed an off-duty Woodbridge firefighter in Clements, Wanda Standerfer can't help but cry when she talks about it.

She's spent the last month agonizing over every detail of that Aug. 26 night, waking up to nightmares about Chad Harris striking her windshield.

"I wanted to know why he was in the road, why he didn't see me. Now I know," she said Thursday after getting a copy of the California Highway Patrol's conclusion on the crash.

The report, citing autopsy results, said Harris had a "very high level of alcohol intoxication" with a blood-alcohol content level of 0.31 percent.

"The only 'why' answer I don't know is, why did it have to involve me?" Standerfer said, trying unsuccessfully to stop the tears that ran down her cheeks.

She's going through various stages of grief, and it might make it a little harder that Harris was 27-year-old firefighter whose job was to save lives.

He was celebrating a co-worker's birthday after spending the day helping his new roommate move into his Lodi home.

They had done things the safe way: The small group of firefighters had a designated driver, Harris was off-duty and he was well above the legal drinking age of 21.

They went to The Old Corner Saloon on Highway 88, had a couple drinks and then decided to go across the street to Clements Feed & Fuel for dinner, according to the CHP report. Harris was chatting with a Lockeford woman he'd just met and they were last to leave so they could first finish their drinks.

At 8:05 p.m., they began to cross the highway.

Standerfer was driving home to Valley Springs after taking home-grown figs and grapes to a friend in Acampo.

A native of Stockton and graduate of Lodi High School, Standerfer now works full-time taking care of a school teacher who suffered a stroke, as well as the woman's mentally handicapped adult daughter.

She was driving east in a blue 2007 Honda Civic hybrid, and told investigators that she saw two people run across the road and took her foot off the accelerator.

Standerfer has since realized that the action made her car quieter, because it's a hybrid — when the car isn't accelerating, it's nearly silent. She even scoured the Internet after the accident, trying to compare the decibel levels of hybrid and regular cars.

Standerfer said she wasn't on the phone and wasn't fiddling with the radio. She kept watching the pedestrians but never saw another one until she felt a thump.

She braked, pulled over and dialed 9-1-1 as witnesses ran to help Harris. His fellow firefighters tried to save him, but his injuries were too severe and he died at the scene.

Woodbridge firefighters are still grieving the loss of a man for whom their chief had nothing but kind words.

"He was very knowledgeable, one of our most dedicated firefighters — not to say that our firefighters aren't dedicated, but he went above and beyond," Chief Mike Kirkle said Thursday. "He was an asset to this agency. We are truly at a loss."

Standerfer, who turned 59 four days after the collision, is also grieving. She's wanted to contact Harris' family to extend her condolences, but has been advised that if she accidentally says "I'm sorry," that could be interpreted by an attorney as admitting liability.

"I am not a cold-hearted person. I want them to know that. This will never be over for me," she said.

She said she has suffered the loss of a young child, her mother and her grandparents, but none of that could prepare her for this tragedy. At this point, she's in the anger stage of grieving, but most of the time she's simply sad.

She sometimes dwells on the timing — if Harris had left the bar 30 seconds later, if she had left her friend's home earlier.

"There's a lot of 'if's,' a lot of 'if only's.' 'If' is the biggest word in the dictionary," she said.

The car is being repaired — to the tune of more than $12,000. But Standerfer would have preferred it if insurance adjusters had totaled the car: Even if it had been a financial loss, she doesn't want to get behind the wheel of that vehicle again.

Standerfer is trying to move on, though she sometimes finds herself walking her dogs outside under the stars, talking aloud to the firefighter she never met.

"They say all things happen for a reason," she said. "And now I'm trying to figure out why I had to be involved."

Contact reporter Layla Bohm at layla@lodinews.com.

Reader Feedback

plant lady wrote on Oct 8, 2009 8:48 PM:

" City Football..I agree that 3 posters do need to apologise to the reporter, she was just reporting what the CHP had said and NEWS is NEWS whether you like it or not. To the 3 people whose names are in the chp report who were adimant that Harris WAS not drunk,did you go to school to read drunk people? Well.you flunked! Untill caltrans puts a blinking light and or a ped sign..Maybe when people who have been drinking leave the bar in Clements, they need to wear a hat with a blinking light so they can be seen. And have you noticed that none of his friends have posted after his tox report was released. As for a apology to Ms. Standerfer, thats not nessecary, shes quite aware that people who jump to conclusions live in Lockeford and Lodi also. I just hope that anyone who knows of this accident, will slow down going through Clements knowing that drunks DO RUN cross the Hwy with THEIR backs to oncoming traffic. Ms.Standerfer wants to thank all the posters who showed compassion for her,your posts definetly shine over the posts the ones wanting to place blame where it didnt belong "

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Lodian wrote on Oct 7, 2009 2:06 PM:

" Choosing to be drunk is never a good idea. "

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CityFootball wrote on Oct 4, 2009 7:47 PM:

" I remember when this story first broke after Mr. Harris tragic death that people who claimed they were with Harris that night and that he was not drunk were viciously attacking both the driver, Mrs. Standerfer and the reporter, Layla Bohm.

Now that both of them have been vindicated as a result of the CHP report, those bloggers owe both Standerfer and Bohm huge apologies for their quick rush to judgment.

Of course, it probably won't happen, but my sympathy goes out to everyone involved. "

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jbhiker wrote on Oct 3, 2009 4:25 PM:

" Well someone has to be blamed. It could not be the fact that nobody pays attention to the speed limit or that it is dark or there is no stop sign or the speedlimit there is too high. Let's blame someone. Then we won't have to think about a way to stop it from ever happening again. "

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plant lady wrote on Oct 3, 2009 8:55 AM:

" Ms Standerfer knows that some comments from posters are made without them having all the facts. Chp placed the blames on Mr. Harris for failure to yeild to oncoming traffic, cvc21954a. No, she was not speeding and she does not harbour guilt, but that does not stop the reruns or erase the images or ease the pain she feels for his family.
She has known from that night that this was not her fault. With the CHP report finished, now she can and will start the healing process and try and get past all this. May be easier said than done, but she is a strong person and she will be ok. "

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ordinarycitizen wrote on Oct 3, 2009 12:11 AM:

" This accident was such a tragedy and I am very sorry for Mr. Harris's family. If Ms. Standerfer had been speeding, the CHP would have specified that, but it didn't. There are such things as accidents. She said she was paying close attention to the road because she saw pedestrians running in the street. She slowed down. This guy ran right out in front of her - being that he was drunk he had no way of gauging exactly how fast the car was coming towards him, especially at night. What a tragic thing to have to live with, and I pray for peace of mind for Ms. Standerfer. I pray that somehow she finds peace so that she will no longer have the nightmares, the guilt or the pain. And it must be especially hard reading negative posts because it only adds to her sense of guilt and pain. This woman needs compassion and forgiveness - she needs to forgive herself. My heart truly goes out to her too. "

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onestooge wrote on Oct 3, 2009 12:06 AM:

" how many lives does alcohol take a year? "

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Mrs. S. wrote on Oct 2, 2009 11:52 PM:

" One more thing - pedestrians always have the right of way, drunk or sober. However, walking out in front of a moving car is never a good idea. The car is usually moving much faster than you can get out of the way.

It also takes almost the length of a football field to stop a car at 55 mph. I found this out after I was involved in a multi-fatal accident, caused by an intoxicated driver.

As for your implication that this driver should share blame, your post reads more like you want to pin it all on her. "

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Mrs. S. wrote on Oct 2, 2009 11:34 PM:

" Of course drunks have the right to walk anywhere without being crushed by a cager.

However, their cager will be doing the crushing if they get behind the wheel. I'm sure Mr. Harris was following some people in a group that included a designated driver, though. "

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dogs4you wrote on Oct 2, 2009 10:04 PM:

" jb, HOG is not a dirty word, FYI HOG stands for Harley Owners Group which can mean anything from an old fat boy or the sharpest ride on the road. That old watering hole in Clements has sent many a drink drivers on their way. Shame you feel that way about the country we live in. "

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jbhiker wrote on Oct 2, 2009 9:13 PM:

" There are no innocents in any accident. The only exception may be someone crushed by a falling meteor. And Dogs, you are wrong. I drive a KLR. Hogs are nothing more than an annoyance, especially to neighbors. KLR Riders have nothing to prove and don't need a rumble seat to prove their manliness. I do ride the speed limit and I do stop as required by law and I pay attention in case there are any drunk people in Clements or anywhere else for that matter. They have a right to walk without being crushed by a zombie cager. The problem is people - all people - even you and me. We are too happy to blame someone and forget it. Turn on any radio or tv and what do you hear? That is why America has become the cesspool of the world. We don't deserve anything, especially not the Olympics. I do what I can, do you? "

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Mrs. S. wrote on Oct 2, 2009 8:44 PM:

" I don't think anyone should deflect attention away from the dangers of alcohol and roads. It's tragic this young man died, but it's good he wasn't driving. Intoxication dulls one's ability to judge risks (i.e. crossing the road), and slows reaction times.

I drive 88 quite often and know first hand how many crazy, speedy drivers there are, however.

I hope the CHP report eases this woman's mind. She doesn't sound as though she had been speeding, or the report would have said so. "

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plant lady wrote on Oct 2, 2009 6:22 PM:

" I personally know the driver that hit Mr. Harris, this tragedy has had a huge impact on her life, her confidence as a driver has been affected. most of the time if she stays busy, shes semi ok, its the times when she has to drive past that spot in Clements that really shakes her. If anyone has any questions for her, post them here...she reads this also. If your questions aren't too personal, she will reply through me. "

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dogs4you wrote on Oct 2, 2009 4:42 PM:

" jbhiker, you ride a motercycle and go the speed limit, better sell it before you get run over. As far as riskie drivers are concerned, they are everwhere, when your on the road you have to fend for yourself. At times a good offence is better than a good defence. Come to think of it, JB, ever ride between cars at 55 MPH or better, lots of bike riders do. I rode for over 30 years, been down twice. There are two kinds of M/C riders, the ones that have been down and the one`s that will. I`ll bet you ride an `ol HOG. "

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dogs4you wrote on Oct 2, 2009 4:30 PM:

" Very sad indeed, however lets put the blame where it is deserved. Not the road, or the speed limit. Until this morning I had no idea what his blood alcohol level was. At .031 that young man was hammered concidering .08 puts you in jail. While most of the blame rests with him, the people that were with him were in a way responable for his well being. I pitty the lady that was driving the car that hit him, in time his friends will remember him a little less as time goes by, however the lady that hit him will see him coming through the windshield of her car for the rest of her life. "

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plant lady wrote on Oct 2, 2009 2:20 PM:

" I agree with jbhiker on the way people speed on hwy 12 and 88.. no regards to others lives or property. If you do drive the speed limit, you are literally risking your life. Lowering the speed through Clements is one factor that needs to change. And the state being in such bad shape financially, put a CHP officer either before or right after Clements and see first hand exactly how fast people do drive and watch the fines climb. Some of the other factors to change would be streetlights, blinking cross walks and pedistrian signs. Over the years at alot of major hwy crossings, i.e. 12 at 88 and Eightmile Rd at 88, it takes for someone to die before Caltrans or the CHP make changes. In my opinion, one death is way more than enough reason for things to change. Along with commenting on this tragedy, also everyone should email, call or visit the Caltrans office in Lodi and the CHP office in Stockton and give their opinion. R.I.P. Chad "

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jbhiker wrote on Oct 2, 2009 10:31 AM:

" Drinking or not, it is still Downtown Clements. A deadly place for anyone - driving, cycling or walking. And I am not only aware of the drinkers, but also the zombie drivers passing through there. Valley Springs can be just as bad but they got a stop sign and real speed control, same as Farmington. San Andreas lowered the speed to 35, something I thought was brilliant. I think the people in Clements need to start smelling the fertilizer in their own city. "

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deblaw wrote on Oct 2, 2009 8:25 AM:

" Sad all the way around... "

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OTH wrote on Oct 2, 2009 8:02 AM:

" This is a tragedy all the way around. The speed limit may change but my experience has been no one pays attention to it. "

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lynn wrote on Oct 2, 2009 7:33 AM:

" jb: I believe the last two people struck and killed out there both had been drinking. It was the people crossing the road not the drivers who were at fault. "

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jbhiker wrote on Oct 2, 2009 7:26 AM:

" The speed limit in Clements changes to 45. I always slow down and then a pile of cars end up on my tail. Even worse on my Motorcycle when I try to go the speed limit out there. But I have NEVER seen a radar. I am surprised the people in Clements have not spoken up on this one. The nuts heading to 88 & Jackson are some of the riskiest drivers I ever saw. "

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